Got Sunscreen?

It is still a little difficult for me to wrap my head around the fact that Pixie is dealing with melanoma. We are confident that once she has her surgery she will recover completely. But I am filled with anger. Pixie was one of the hundreds of thousands that bought into the lie the tanning industry spews regarding the relative "safety" of using tanning beds. Safety? Where is her safety now? Because of the choices that she made (and let's face it, there aren't many teenage/young twenty something's that don't make the same choices) her risk for reoccurence are great. We put warning labels on alcohol and cigarettes but allow our young women to consistenly put themselves at risk on a daily basis by encouraging this vision that we have that you have to be golden brown to be considered desirable and healthy. When in fact, the complete opposite is true. I will never look at someone with a tan in the same way ever again. Our Pixie has a son to raise, a husband who needs his wife, and a family that cannot imagine life without her. Thankfully her prognosis is excellent, but the risk factor will always be there-lurking just underneath the surface. From this moment on, I pledge to never leave my home without sun protection. I vow to maintain the vigil that I already have in place with Dreamsicle-even when she is 15 and desperate to follow her friends this is one fight I won't back down from. Hopefully by instilling in her right now good sun protection habits there won't be a fight-but if there is-I love her too much to allow her to make choices that could have a lifetime of unintended consequences all in the name of vanity.
So, I have my sunscreen, do you have yours?

My Sweet Pixie

Yep, the hits just keep coming in the McGyver family. Just when we were beginning to find a new rhythm, we have been thrown a curve-ball. I received a call yesterday from U*Haul. Dreamsicle and I were on a plane headed down to Georgia 5 hours later. Pixie had a few moles removed last week, only to find that one of them was cancerous. My sweet Pixie had a malignant melanoma on her neck. When the call came from the dermatologist with the news, he told her that she needed to have surgery today. They stressed that swift aggressive action was necessary so Dreamsicle and I flew down to help in any way that we can. When Pixie met with the surgeon this morning, he felt that the surgery was too complex to perform in the manner that was originally planned so she is now scheduled for surgery next Wednesday. We will stay here and get my sweeties through this rough patch. In the mean time, it is so good to spend time with the three of them. It has been a joy to fall in love all over again with the Little Pea-he has grown so much that he is now only 5 pounds less than Dreamsicle! Please keep our precious Pixie, U*Haul and Little Pea in your prayers.

Family

This past weekend found us in a campground surrounded by all of our favorite peeps-our extended family. Once a year we get together for a camping/family reunion weekend. This year even included my cousins that I haven't seen in years! I consider myself so blessed to have such a great group of people that I enjoy so much (enough to spend an entire weekend with-HA!). I seriously am related to some of the best. cooks. evah. The food on Saturday was delish and the opportunity to catch up with my aunts, cousins and cousins kids was priceless. I tend to giggle a lot listening to everybody which makes my heart happy-something I desperately need right now. We all missed my Aunt S and Uncle H and their kids this year and I truly hope that sometime within the next few years we will be able to see all of that family again. Sorry for the lack of pictures Aunt S-I forgot my camera at home!

Santa made a surprise visit to the campground via his golf cart-Dreamsicle could not believe her eyes when the Jolly Old Elf appeared. She has not stopped talking about him since.

I was sad that none of my boys were there but we are gearing up for a trip to Disney in December that will serve as our nuclear family reunion. After watching the way Dreamsicle opened up with Santa, I cannot wait to see what she is going to be like with the characters this visit.

My Military Men

We received a call from Chester yesterday letting us know that instead of having to wait until September 11th for his enlistment to be complete, he is going to be home in the middle of August! He has enough leave on the books to allow for this to happen. I am so happy! As proud as I am of his service to our country, I am so ready to have him home. Home-where the worries are minimal and he can begin the next chapter in his life.

Speaking of proud, U*Haul has been selected as the Blue Jacket Sailor of the quarter for his division. This was quite an honor for someone who has not even reached the two year mark of his military career. Way to go U*Haul!

Shy Girl

I love my Dreamsicle. She is gentle and kind. She is also shy. The past year has seen her make tremendous progress in opening up but there are still situations that pop up where she really becomes uncomfortable. I struggle with how to help her overcome this since I am the exact opposite. People have called me alot of things over the years but shy has never been one of them.

We had lesson 2 of 5 mandarin lessons yesterday. The first week she volunteered to help the teacher out while telling a story, yesterday she volunteered to wear the "birthday crown" while the teacher was explaining how birthdays are celebrated in China. Imagine my surprise when my girl who is my heart, who excitedly volunteered to where the crown and stand next to the teacher burst into tears when people starting singing Happy Birthday to her in Mandarin! She was so uncomfortable it made my heart ache and she ran back into my arms for comfort. How does a Mama who would have been cupping her hand to her ear telling everyone "sing it louder baby!" if I had been standing up there, help her shy girl tackle these kinds of situations?

How We Spent 4th of July

I know, look at me-two posts in one day!

We made the decision to head to the UP for the long holiday weekend. The town that GOM has a home in up there still puts on a 4th of July celebration like they used to back in the "good old days". The fireworks were held on July 3rd and I loved the fact that we could park on main street and tote a cooler of our favorite beverages to the town park where every one else had gathered to watch the night time sky be lit by reds, greens and blues. I did quite a bit of coaching this year in preparation for the fireworks with Dreamsicle. You may recall that she shut down two years ago while watching them and last year forced us to leave the display early-she simply could not handle the noise and the colors freaked her out. I hit pay dirt when I told her that this year we would watch them with everyone else (pointing out a number of smaller children that were in attendance) and that if she could sit and enjoy them we would include a trip to the Magic Kingdom at night to watch the fireworks over Cinderella's castle and watch Tinkerbell fly when we take our trip to Disney. That is all that it took-she was oohing and aahing with the best of them! The next day found us at the parade then back down to the community park where there was food/games and lots of socializing taking place. Dreamsicle had a ball. It was a nice break from all of the sadness lately.

Is it really the middle of July?

I am seriously surprised by the date today. Funny what happens to your mind when you are dealing with grief. Perhaps I should clarify that to say funny what happens to *my* mind when I am dealing with grief. I have learned to live by the mantra take one day at a time, don't look too far forward or things become unmanageable. I miss our Grumpy Old Man. I am sad that we didn't really get to say goodbye due to the circumstances that surrounded his death. And just when you think you have a handle on life, you have to begin to handle his affairs. And the greed and ugliness in people starts to begin. I truly hate that part. My parents were not wealthy. My Dad left a treasure to each of his four children and thankfully my Mom is still alive. Having experienced the ick that went along with his death I decided that any material goods that my Mom had, I did not want-except for a broken down jewelry box that I used to love to play with when I was small and the hutch she has in her home now so that I can hand it down to Dreamsicle. I asked her to amend her will so that I do not have to deal with any of the craziness that is bound to happen when she passes. Watching McGyver go through what he is going through right now has solidified my decision.

If you are reading this, please do me a favor and remember this-your parents owe you nothing. You make your own way in this life, and you should not "expect" anything. You are not "owed" large insurance policies, retirement funds or the right to sell the personal property of your loved one that passed away for your personal gain. And if you don't agree with me, I strongly urge you to take a long look at your inner being. Greedy is not how I ever want to be remembered.

Back to Everyday Life

The memorial service for Grumpy Old Man was beautiful. I actually managed to get through the eulogy without crying and it was so wonderful to see all of the people that came to pay their last respects to him. Mcgyver heard many stories about his father as he was growing up that GOM's childhood friends shared with him.

And my friends. I do not have words to describe how much I value and appreciate them. Since the memorial service was held at our home, I fully intended on pulling out my usual Mar*tha Ste*wart and taking care of everyone. My friends had other plans for me. They completely took over-preparing food, filling dishes when they got low-washing dishes to give back to people who had so thoughtfully brought a dish to pass-all the while insisting that I focus on my family. They were angels in bodies that day let me tell you.

Yesterday found me back into the mix at the office. It felt good to focus on work. This week is going to fly by as we have a few major presentations happening on Thursday then the long weekend.

And I am doing something positive-beginning to make preparations for a trip to Dis*ney-the one place that we all seem to run to when we need our batteries re-charged. Where else would a crazy family like ours go except to the "Happiest Place on Earth" to spend time together and heal?

Father's Day

Father's Day will forever be a bittersweet day in the McGyver house from now on. Grumpy Old Man lost his fight shortly after midnight yesterday. It was terribly hard to let him go, for McGyver to have to say good bye to his father on this day of all days. But at the same time, it was appropriate that GOM would meet his Heavenly Father on this day.

Grumpy Old Man was a no nonsense kind of guy. He did not want a funeral. Instead, we will honor him with a memorial service at our home on Saturday, followed by one of his favorite activities-a fish fry.

We will eat the fish that GOM would spend every winter catching for just such an occasion-a celebration of a life well lived, a way to honor an honorable man.

Rest in peace Grumpy Old Man, you will be missed.

Day 9

Things have gone from bad to worse. Grumpy Old Man is losing his battle with this illness that came on so suddenly and refuses to loosen its grip.

I cannot believe how unbearably hard it is to watch my McGyver, my rock-have to come to grips with the eventual outcome of all of this.

Please keep us in your prayers and for a quick passing of our dear GOM.

Day 8

This waiting is torture. Nothing new to report, platelets refuse to budge. It seems as if they correct one thing and another thing happens. The walk on the tight rope continues

Day 6

The vigil continues. Today's chest x-ray showed marked improvement. Ventilator settings have been reduced. Both positives. Unable to remove the vent until platelets come up just in case the Grumpy Old Man (GOM) has another setback-removing it now could prove to be fatal. Platelets still not budging. Do you think it is possible that my GOM's platelets are just as stubborn and grumpy as he is? Perhaps I should change his name to Grumpy Old Platelet Man LOL.

The healthcare team has decided that this course of treatment is not working so they are changing some things up today.

Baby steps forward-I'll take them as long as we continue to move in the right direction

Day 5

It is day 5 of the hospital vigil for the Grumpy Old Man. I never thought I would say that I am happy to have spent 5 days in the hospital but when you have a critically ill loved one, you pray for another minute, another hour, another day. With each passing hour, we all try to will his body to fight-if our mental energy that is being expended could heal him, I guarantee you that he would be walking out the door of the hospital today. But it can't. So we wait, we pray, and we beg the blood in his body to stop fighting itself and start regenerating. We have been fortunate enough to be able to rent a room at this hospital's version of a Ronald McDonald house for grown-ups. McGyver won't leave his dad's room to sleep but it has allowed me, Dreamsicle and some other family members some respite each day.

And so the vigil continues...

Prayers Please

Tonight I am typing this from the 5th floor of a local hospital as my father in law lies in a bed near me. He is on life support. Thursday, he was out looking for a jeep to purchase with McGyver. Friday morning our worlds changed. He has developed a very rare illness which has left him with virtually no platelets. Without getting into to much detail, the efforts they have put in place are vast, please keep my Grumpy Old Man in your thoughts and prayers, he needs all of the back up he can get.

It's Not Always Easy

Dreamsicle has been such an easy child to take care of. Partly because we are "seasoned" parents, partly because we knew what to expect and were able to roll with the ups and downs that first year. This second year of her being part of her forever family has been smooth, easy sailing. Until now.

Dreamsicle is a perfectionist. With a capital P. She must have order in her life, at all costs. We try extremely hard to keep that order, that sense of normalcy and routine for her. With all of the changes that have occurred in our family recently she has regressed. Almost back to when we first came home.

I can't lie-this is tearing me up.

The birth of the little Pea was the first thing to rock her world, then U*Haul came home for a brief visit, then U*Haul, Little Pea and Pixie left her universe. Add to that the fact that Chester came home, we went camping last weekend in a new trailer, and new people/faces are showing up at the house to see Chester and you begin to get the picture of what amounts to massive amounts of change for my 3.5 year old beauty.

So I have a little cling-on who is a teary mess and begging me not to leave her side.

Back to attachment parenting 101 which we will happily do but it is heartbreaking to watch her suffer

The Day We (Almost) Missed Chester...

Last Friday Chester arrived back in the Mitten State safe and sound. We (almost) missed him. Allow me to take you back to the moment of his arrival from his first deployment. He arrived in the middle of the night, it is an hour drive to the airport from our home. Needless to say, waking up a two year old (at the time), gathering all of our welcome home signs, etc and heading out to begin the drive to the airport was extremely hectic. His plane arrived a few minutes early so he called us from the Tarmac where I proceeded to shout at him "don't you dare walk down that hall until we get into the airport!" After 3-4 additional phone calls I felt comfortable that everyone was in the perfect Kodak position and allowed him to get off of the plane.

Fast forward to his arrival last Friday. We learned our lesson from the first time oh yes we did. We arrived at the airport a full 30 minutes before his plane was scheduled to land. We were so early that I decided I could bop on over to the Star*bucks on the other side of the airport to grab us some coffee. At the same time Aunt Genious took Dreamsicle to the bathroom. Imagine my surprise when 20 minutes later I come back to McGyver looking like the cat that swallowed the canary. I noticed strange people hanging around the table we had commandeered but thought they must be the family from the other Marine that was flying in with Chester. One of them seemed to be reading one of the signs we had made and he was holding it awfully close to his face. Imagine my surprise when the sign was put down and sitting in the chair was Chester!

His plane had arrived right when we were pulling in to the airport. Early again! This time he thought he would be smart and wait up near the jetway until his scheduled arrival time to keep his mom from having a heart attack again. The only problem with that plan was that he thought the time he was supposed to arrive was earlier than he had told us. So, he got off the plane, walked down the hall and entered the airport to be greeted by....McGyver.

So glad that he is getting out of the Marine Corps in August-I don't think my heart could take it.

Mama I'm Home

The sweetest words I have heard in a very long time came from Chester's mouth on Friday. He called me from Germany, then from Maine, then from Marsh Airbase, then the final call-from the parade grounds at 29 palms as soon as he got off the bus. There was such happiness in his voice, and a sense of....relief. He was met by his buddies that arrived home a few weeks earlier with the advanced team so one of them handed him his cell phone, told him to call his Mama then handed him a beer and welcomed him home. He will be arriving in the Mitten State next Friday morning-I am counting the hours until I get to actually touch him again. Although it was much calmer where he was this time versus the last time, knowing that your son is in harm's way adds this weight to your shoulders that you become so accustomed to carrying around. So much so that when you no longer have to carry that weight you don't know what to do. Worry has secretly been my closest friend for the past 7 months. I said goodbye to that friend this weekend. I actually feel lighter, more free-happier. It is a strange sensation to try to put into words for people who haven't experienced it. To my sweet friend H who has a son who just went over to defend our Country in the other land so far away-I'm here for you sister. Day or Night. When the worry sets in, I will listen. And I promise that one day you will have that weight lifted off of your shoulders as well

Chester in on his way home!!

Just a quick update to let everyone know that Chester is on his way home from Iraq! I should be receiving a call from him either today or tomorrow letting me know that he is back in California.

Thank you so much to all of the prayer warriors that have covered Chester in prayer for the past 7 months, by the grace of God my baby is coming home!!

I Survived...

Last night was quite the experience with Dreamsicle. We had seen Dis*ney On Ice a few months ago so I was fully expecting the evening to go much the same. Boy was I wrong.

We hit the front door to the Arena and Dreamsicle turned into a completely different girl! She is usually a very happy little thing but is somewhat reserved. Last night she lost every ounce of inhibition in her 3 year old little body. I agreed to let her choose one souvenior to purchase. As we patiently waited in line I was watching little girl after little girl choose plush Do*ra's, plush Bo*ots or the Backpack. My kid gets up there and giddily requests to have "the boy". She couldn't get Di*ego into her arms fast enough. (thankfully no large foam cut out figures were available).

We got to our seats and the music started. For the next 1.5 hours my daughter laughed, yelled, jumped up and down and could not get enough. It was hysterical.

She fell asleep on the way home, holding onto Di*ego so tight I thought she could very possibly break his neck. She woke up this morning telling me she had a happy dream. When I asked her what it was about she told me she had a dream about Di*ego the boy. Yikes-I think perhaps I won't share that information with McGyver.

Update on the Fam

McGyver and McGyver's Papa successfully moved U*Haul, Pixie and Lil Pea to Georgia. They moved into their new place and found out they had no water. McGyver pulled a typical McGyver move using a neighbor's outside spicket and was able to rig a temporary solution up so that they would have water until the city decides to come out and correct the problem.

Chester will be arriving back in the States by the end of the week! Did you hear that people? My middle son, my tender hearted boy has fulfilled his 2nd tour of duty in Iraq. There will be no sweeter words that I will ever hear than when I hear him tell me that he is home.

X*Boy is working mad hours at the office and doing so well! I am so proud of him.

Dreamsicle and I will be going to see D*ora the Ex*plorer tonight so remind me to stay strong and not cave into her little eyes peering up at me asking me to buy her some ridiculously over priced souvenior. If you see someone carrying a large foam D*ora cutout-that will probably be me...

My Glass Is Half Full

U*Haul, Pixie and Lil Pea left yesterday to begin their journey to Georgia. After more than a year of being married, they are finally starting their life together as a family. McGyver and McGyver's Papa are hauling all of their wordly possessions down for them so Dreamsicle and I are fending for ourselves for a few days. I moved all of Dreamsicle's toys from the various places in the house (the living room, her bedroom, the basement) into what used to be Pixie's bedroom. Now Dreamsicle has a playroom and she is so happy! And sad! Seriously, she is really trying to work it out in her head. She was so used to having Pixie and Lil Pea there that this has rocked her 3 year old world. I keep telling her that soon the two of us will hop on a plane and head down to see them-I am sure that will help her-but until then we have some ups and downs to work through. Not having the little chunk-a-monk here is pretty wierd though. Gone with him is every last bit of baby from our house. No more high chair, no more jumperoo, no more crib. For the last 3 years I have lived in baby land-first with Dreamsicle then with Lil Pea so it does seem strange to have the house stripped so suddenly.

Carrots For Breakfast

Yesterday I spent a little extra time with Dreamsicle in the morning so I was able to prepare her breakfast. Imagine my surprise when I asked her what she would like me to cook and she chose carrots! Yep, my girl wanted carrots for breakfast. Add a juice box and a go-gurt and she was in heaven.

Mama Musings

It still gets to me. Dreamsicle is an insomniac, just like her mama. I have lost count of the times that I will wake up in the middle of the night, slowly push back the covers as to not awaken a slumbering McGyver and make my way to the computer which is located in the loft, directly outside of our bedroom. Soon, just like clockwork, I will hear the gentle tapping of Dreamsicle's feet as she makes her way up to the loft. When she hits the step that allows her vision to crest the top of the staircase, she gives me an expectant look-almost as if to say-what took you so long to come out here? She will crawl up into my lap with her lovey, stroke my face as I silently kiss her head over and over-being certain to breathe in her scent for I know that far too quickly these precious moments of bonding will be over. She will continue to grow and will not require this level of reassurance which I know is a good thing. But for now, I cherish those late night/early morning cuddles, perhaps I need them just as much as she does.

Random

I wish I had beautiful Easter morning pictures to share with all of you but I don't. Dreamsicle made an early morning appearance that morning and all of the frivolity occurred while still dressed in a t-shirt one size too small and leggings one size too large (her outfit of choice to sleep in the previous night), a serious case of bed head and no time to be bothered to stop long enough for her mama to get a good shot.

You will have to take my word for it-she had a great time. She really dug looking for the eggs and could not believe the luck of a 3.5 year old when her eyes rested on the dark chocolate goodness molded into the shape of a bunny.

Things have been hectic around the mitten state. We are trying to wrap our minds around the fact that in a few short weeks our Lil Pea will be traveling to Georgia to live with his mama and daddy. It is hard to believe that it will be the first time he will live with his daddy and though we are overjoyed the kids finally get to be a family, we sure are going to miss the smiley shorty. We are also gearing up for the soonish arrival back on US soil of Chester-yippee! You all have no idea how happy my heart will be when he finally lands. Knowing that I will not have that worry to contend with again certainly will make for some peacefull sleeping.

G-ma and Poppa will be arriving back in the mitten state in a few short hours-Dreamsicle is about jumping out of her skin as she waits for them to make their appearance at our house. I am kind of thinking of putting sunglasses on when I first see them. Seeing them all tan and relaxed from the winter of sun and leisure just might make me a little green-eyed with envy.

Bad Dreams

Dreamsicle woke up last night after a bad dream. I heard her yelling in her room. From my bedroom it sounded like she was yelling, run from the tatoes! Hurry, hurry! The next thing I knew she was running into our bedroom, soaked in sweat. I scooped her up and wiped away her "eye drips" and asked her if she had a bad dream. She told me yes and we proceeded to talk about it. Apparently she had a bad dream about food. Those dog gone carrots and potatoes were chasing her and she couldn't get away. Anyone care to analyze that dream?

McGyver swears it must have been due to her recent viewing of a few Sp*onge B*ob S*quare-Pants episodes-he thought Sp*onge B*ob was some type of vegetable. Hmmmmm.

Funny What A Little Exercise Will Do

As you can probably tell, I have been stuck in a rut. I forced myself to drag my big old bootie to the gym every day of this week and I am already starting to feel better. Moving my body and the increase in temperatures is certainly helping with my disposition-thank goodness!

Angel On My Mind

Ahhh, the day I dread all year long has somehow snuck up on me. I don't dwell on this date, but somehow my body always knows when March 24th rolls around. This weekend I felt anxious, restless even. I started becoming ugly to the fam on Monday. Today I got to work and felt this wave of nausea, this building of emotion that resulted in my having to close my door and allow myself relief in the form of tears. As I was trying to pull myself together, I was trying to think of what could have possibly triggered this flood of emotion. Then it happened. I looked at the calender. Suddenly everything made sense. Today is the day that my 2nd born passed away. No matter how many years go by, that wave of overwhelming sadness seems to envelope me. *sigh* Grief is a funny thing. You never get over it, you just get used to it.

Recap of Vegas

As some of you know (if you follow me on facebook), I had quite the interesting trip to Vegas. In the airport on the way down, I was sitting next to a man who was breathing into a paperbag as we waited to board our plane. I then got sandwiched in between two of the heaviest, sweatiest men I have ever met from Chicago to Vegas. I literally ran to my room once I got my room key just to take a shower. No joke-the stench was awful. Speaking of stench, sat next to someone who had mad gas for the entire day one full day at the conference. Silent but deadly all day long. I think I may have turned a little green by the end of the day. I wanted to check out the pool at the hotel I was staying at, imagine my surprise when I ended up the "clothing optional" pool by mistake! I had to get up super early to catch my flight home. As I was leaving the hotel at 3:30 am I was standing in the taxi line along with alot of young adults. They had been clubbing all night. How do I know this? Might have been when the girl wearing the veil, surrounded by her friends who were actually helping her stay vertical, face planted on the asphalt as she tried to get in the cab-took 4 of her friends down with her. Or the girl who ran from behind me to try to help them, all the while still holding onto an ice pack the hotel had given her to help with the swelling of the black eye she received while at the club. Hmmm, wonder how they all felt the next afternoon. Anyway, it was a good conference and made lots of good contacts. Next time I go I'll try to remember to bring a face mask and elbow pads...

This Week

Started off pretty horrible. Work stuff mostly which seems to be sorting itself out. Merging two companies has certainly had both blessings and challenges. Let's just leave it at that.

We all have been sick in the McGyver house since Sunday. Each with a different virus-this freaks me out to no end~ I will have you know. I just keep having visions of catching the other two forms of illness running rampant through my home, yuck. If I help wash Dreamsicle's hands any more she has informed me that they will most certainly fall off her body.

I keep trying to look forward to the end of the week when I leave for Vegas. Things being what they are, McGyver has cancelled his portion of the trip so I'm on my own this time 'round. Long conference days should keep me busy and it might do me some good to just be able to catch up on a good book and rest during my off time. Hopefully Ms Ginger will be in town while I am there so I can catch up with my multi state living sista.

Just to make you smile-imagine my three year old singing the title track to Mama Mia and dancing the entire way through it. Over. and over. and over. and over. Her day care provider has the DVD and has obviously allowed the little three year old fashionista's to view it on more than one occasion. It does make me smile.

Ugh

I am sick. And tired. No really-I am sick and tired. But then, there is the other kind of sick and tired which I am in the throes of as well. So much deceit, so much anxiety. So much....

Can you all who know me in real life do me one small favor please? PLEASE?

Be who you say you are, do what you say you are going to do, don't hide in the shadows and please above everything else-just. be. honest.

Thank you.

Big Daddy

Yep, that is what Dreamsicle is now calling McGyver. I have no idea where she picked that one up but it is so hysterical (and so fitting). McGyver went away for the night on Saturday. She woke up Sunday morning wondering where her "Big Daddy" was. McGyver is 5'11" but is very big so it is totally appropriate for my littlest of little girls to think of him in that context. He is so stuck with that name from now on. Ha!

Dreamsicle and I had an action packed weekend. I took the day off from work on Friday and we met with some of our playgroup at a place called Play*World. An entire building of bouncy houses and slides, games and more! She had a blast. The only bad thing was that I really enjoy visiting with the other moms and at a place like this, you are kind of forced to go where your kid wants to go. Dreamsicle being the timid one wasn't about to crawl through the tubes and mazes like the other girls so there wasn't alot of visiting going on. We then headed out to do some clothes shopping for the little darlin. I am so in trouble. My girl is already showing signs of becoming a fashionista. She was very vocal about what she likes and doesn't like. She's three people! She is definately channeling my now deceased mother in law-no pastel, demure solid colors for our babe. Everything MUST! BE! COLORFUL! or ANIMAL PRINT! or she wanted nothing to do with it. The other shoppers were cracking up as they heard this little sweet looking thing veto one frilly little grey frock I happened to pick up. I was eyeing the thing picturing how sweet Dreamsicle would look in it when she proclaimed to all within earshot-"Mama, I not like that, it not pretty. Put that back please. Hmmmmm.

We survived Disn*ey On I*ce on Saturday. She was waving and clapping until she couldn't wave any longer. Passed out in the car on the way home and slept like a log all night long.

Now it's back to reality but only 4 more days until we can have more fun together.

Open My Mouth

We are a little bit nuts about Dis*ney at Casa de la Dreamsicle. It has always been that way, not just since Dreamsicle arrived. She has caught the fever though.

About a month ago I saw a tv commercial for Dis*ney On Ice. I immediately went online and bought tickets. The stars aligned that day and I was able to snag the Dreamster and I two front row tickets for the big event. Which will take place on Saturday. Last Saturday she saw the commercial and was so excited just watching the ad that I opened my mouth and proclaimed that we would be going to see the show! Next Saturday! Only 6 sleeps from now! Yep-I told my 3 year old about an event that would be taking place 7 days later.

Let's review how my days have gone since I let the cat out of the bag. Saturday immediately following the proclamation...

D-Mama, I'm tired I need to sleep now
D (after waking from nap) I sleeped-how many sleeps to go?

Last night...
D-Mama, are you awake (last night as she is crawling into our bed)
M-No D, Mama is sleeping.
D-Wake up-is it time to go yet?

This morning...
D-Yeah! It is time to go see Mick*ey Mou*se!
M-No, we still have a few days left to wait
D-Mama, let's go to sleep now!

I have a feeling it is going to be a very long week.

Sappy mom post

These kids of mine make me want to burst sometimes.

Chester called from Iraq to let me know that he has been thinking of me and wanted to be sure that I knew how much he loves me. I so appreciate the way that he calls and truly values my opinion when he is working through something stressful in his life

U*haul called to let me know the same thing before he gets "under-way". He thanked me and asked me to thank his daddy for being so cool. :)

My X*Boy moved back into our house for awhile and it has been so great having him home where I can hug him and see his wonderful smile (we are having his house tested to make sure it is free from toxins-long boring story)

And the icing on the cake yesterday-Dreamsicle told me that I made her laugh so hard that her eyes were "dripping".

These dang kids of mine make my eyes drip too.

My Girl

Dreamsicle and I had a fabulous evening last night. It was just the two of us at home. After reading books we spent the entire evening on the floor rolling around, playing with her toys. The belly laughs that came out of her filled my heart with such joy.

And when I put her to bed last night she hugged me tightly and whispered in my ear-I love you mama you make my tummy happy.

And So It Begins

Dreamsicle has become obsessed with babies. I am certain it is because she watched Pixie's stomach grow then one day a beautiful baby boy showed up at our house! She is now looking for affirmation that she came from my tummy. We have talked about the fact that she is adopted from the moment her feet hit US soil but she is now at the age where she is beginning to process what all of that means. Please don't let me mess these discussions up!

Random Things

1.U*haul will be going "under way" soon for the first time. He will be part of the crew of his submarine, actually doing the job that he has been training for over the past year. He called me yesterday to let me know that he was on his way to get some last minute supplies. Things like more socks and t-shirts and under way-r (underwear). I crack myself up.

2.The temperatures are actually climbing and I can feel my spirits lifting!

3.We have heard from Chester quite a bit over the last 30 days, now we expect that we won't hear from him so much for quite a while.

4.I think I am developing an ulcer.

5. I am missing my Dad alot right now.

6.I think I may be addicted to changing the background of my blog. So many choices!

7. I am determined to catch up on all of my laundry this weekend .

TGIF!

I couldn't leave the whiny post up at the top. That is so not me. So-Happy Friday!

Winter Hum-Drums

Yep, I've got them. It appears as if the temperature is actually going to begin climbing back up now so we should be on the back end of the ick but I'm stuck in the single digits emotionally today. I think the lack of sun for so long has really done me in. Maybe I need to invest in a light box. What I really need is a warm weather destination vacation but that won't be happening this year. Way to much going on right now. Now that I think about it, it may be the level of busy that is getting me down. I come home from work exhausted and my time with Dreamiscle is so precious that I can't seem to tear myself away from her long enough to throw in a load of laundry, straighten up the house or (heaven forbid) actually exercise.

I am sure that if I stopped whining it would help tremendously-hmmmm-off to sing a happy song and find my happy place

Don't Try This At Home....

So yesterday I was being all Mar*tha Stew*art-y and making all kinds of tasty and delish foods to nosh on for the Super*bowl. One of those dishes happened to be guacamole. I lurv me some good homemade guac. I happily mashed the avacadoes, squeezed the limes for fresh lime juice and diced the tomatoes and jalapenos... after mixing aforementioned ingredients in a happy little bowl and placing it gently in the 'fridge I jumped in the shower. Things were going well as I washed my hair, applied conditioner and went to wash my face. I started scrubbing my face with my hands lathered in face wash, making sure to give my eyes a good once over so as to avoid those pesky racoon eyes that come with not getting all of your mascara off when I literally felt like my face was on fire. Note to self...be certain that the jalapeno residue is thoroughly rinsed off your hands before taking a shower.

I need a cleaning fairy...

And a cooking fairy, and a laundry fairy and well, you get the picture. I am so not complaining about how busy we are but dang-I am seriously packing on some pounds from eating on the run. I am resorting to picking up clothes, smelling them then putting them back on (okay it's not quite that bad yet but still). This business needs as much time and attention as we can give it (probably the reason I am still at the office right now). Dreamsicle's illness meant 5 days of X*boy watching her at the house since she was too ill to go to daycare. I do not have to worry about the care Dreamsicle receives from X*boy-he ranks real high on her favorite person list but the house looks like a bomb went off every day when I get home and I think if this keeps up I may begin using my stove as a decorative object since it isn't being used to cook anything.

Chasing My Tail

Chinese New Year began yesterday. I had every intention of starting the New Year honoring some of the traditions that go along with the celebrating. Doing things like thoroughly cleaning my house, decorating appropriately, handing out red envelopes-making a yummy dinner.

But the unexpected delay in getting out of Vegas which put us home on Sunday rather than Saturday coupled with Dreamsicle needing all of the time, attention and love I can give her right now since she is very ill brought my good intentions to a screeching halt.

Thankfully she is only three so she won't remember that we did nothing but I think just to be safe I should start planning now for next year.

Where Is The Time Going?

Wow, I blinked and January is almost over! Things have been crazy busy with work-I'm hoping that by the middle of February we will be able to slow down a little. Dreamsicle is spending more than enough time in the "oppice" with us. It hasn't helped that we have been virtually house bound because of the frigid temperatures. We watched the news this morning and it looks like there is another arctic blast coming our way-just in time for our return home. Blech.

We were able to spend time with my older sister this past week. Her family moved into their new home a month ago and all I can say is Wow! It is absolutely beautiful. And so deserved after everything that she has survived over the years. I am so proud of you Ginger-you go girl!

Happy 2009!

May this year be filled with joy and happiness for you all. May you be filled with peace and enjoy many nights of childlike slumber.

Goodbye 2008!

The January Project

It is funny how there are times in your life when a cliche really is an appropriate method to describe a feeling. This past May I was filled with sadness, hurt and even a little bit of despair. I had to question everything I thought I knew, learned that people I thought I could count on I really couldn't once there was nothing left for them to gain from me. Forced to realize that more often than not the word "friendship" held no value to people I would have laid down my life for. That period of my life was a dark, dark space that I wasn't sure I would ever be able to crawl out of.



During that period someone reminded me that God never closes a door without opening a window. At the time of that little reminder I wasn't so ready to really believe that. In fact, I am pretty sure I might have even said a few bad words to the person that gave me that gentle reminder if I am not mistaken. But it is true. So. True.



Out of all of the evil and darkness, a transformation began to take place. My relationship with McGyver was strengthened. When I couldn't pick my head up off of my pillow, he was there. When I couldn't string two coherent sentences together without bursting into tears he was there. When I was hurt by the silence and distance of others my husband was there. Through it all he reminded me of who I was. He forced me to look ahead. He challenged me to grow. Through that whole process I fell in love with my man all over again. The relationship we have because of what we endured is worth the pain we had to go through to get where we are now. That gift alone is priceless. But the Lord was not done with just giving us the gift of a renewed relationship and belief in each other.



He had additional plans for us. We started our new company in July. Still wobbly and shaken, I was forced to put myself out there to push for our vision to create a company that valued its employees, brought jobs to our local economy and allowed me the opportunity to truly be present in Dreamsicle's life. We were blessed with a tiny little account to whom I will forever be grateful. When they agreed to sign with us our company started. Soon after that we were blessed with a much larger client. We were able to hire employees, lease office space, really start working towards fulfilling our dreams. From July until now we have seen steady growth-now on the cusp of 2009 we are growing again.



Today at 2:00 we acquired another company. A company that is quadruple the size of what we were this morning. A company that has incredible employees, shares a vision much like our own and gives us the ability to bring more jobs to our local area, allowing us to employ more people who so desperately need work. The opportunity presented itself a little over a month ago so we have been working day and night to make this happen. The odds were against us, the timeline so tight that we know that the Lord cleared the way in order for us to make this happen.



We have been blessed. And because of His blessings we hope to be able to bless others-with a job close to home, a good wage and a great place to work.



So the next time someone tells you the old "the Lord doesn't close a door without opening a window" cliche, be still and wait to feel the wind from the open window.

I used to laugh at my Grandma

My mom came from a large family. Growing up we would visit my Grandma's house and she would always have something yummy she could pull out of the freezer to warm up for us to eat. I cannot remember the number of times she would tell us that she had trouble learning how to cook for just her and my Grandpa after the kids grew up. I would always giggle to myself wondering just how hard could it be to reduce your serving sizes.

Grandma is now up in Heaven but I owe her an apology. Apparently I have more of her in me than I even realized. This is what I prepared for our Christmas dinner last night:

Appetizers
Cold Shrimp
Water Chestnuts wrapped in bacon
Beef Roll Ups

Main Course
Potato/Squash Soup
Prime Rib
Rice Pilaf
Garlic Bread

Dessert
Pumpkin Pie with Whipped Cream

Guess who I made all of that for...McGyver, me, X*Boy and Dreamsicle.

We will be eating leftovers for a very, very long time.

The absence of Chester and U*Haul was felt by everyone. Little Pea and Pixie were home for the opening of gifts in the morning but then headed out on the road for more celebrating with her family so it was a quiet afternoon.

The morning on the other hand was a flurry of happiness and toddler giggles as Dreamsicle opened her gifts. She totally got the whole go to bed on Christmas Eve wake up to gifts from Santa on Christmas morning. So much so that when she went to bed last night she asked if Santa was going to come again. Heh, smart kid.

Mmmmmm

How did the McGyver family spend this weekend? Watching the snow accumulate on the deck (yep, just inches to go before it is higher than the deck railing, better get X*boy busy shoveling) and making our annual Gingerbread House! Each candy was lovingly test-tasted by Dreamsicle before being allowed to be added to the house. After that we moved on to making 4 different types of Christmas cookies. Many tastes of icing and sprinkles later, the day had turned into night and the joy of trying to get Dreamsicle calmed down from all of the sugar enough to go to bed began. We had a great day and I am still so thankful that we are able to be the parents to this little girl.

Happy!

We are in the middle of a terrible snowstorm, and yet I am filled with happiness today. Chester was able to call this morning (3:45 am) to be exact. He is doing well and our first 5 packages have finally caught up with him. He said that it was kind of fun opening up a package that had Halloween candy and decorations in it right now, who knows when he will finally receive his Christmas packages but he is taking it all in stride.

I am counting down the days until U*Haul comes home-he won't be home for Christmas but will be here shortly thereafter.

Dreamsicle is experiencing another language explosion. That girl has a HUGE vocabulary but now she is stringing together really long sentences. And talks non-stop. McGyver and I laugh so hard sometimes. She wakes up talking and goes to bed talking. We are so in awe of her.

X*Boy is working mad hours snowplowing so he doesn't have much time to himself right now but he is smiling as he is taking his checks to the bank!

The January Project is gearing up to launch

Life is good!

Why?

Why are all of the mirrors in my house so far away that I cannot tell that my eyebrows are in serious need of waxing until I look in the mirror at the office and scare myself thinking I have caterpillars crossing my brows?

Why did I have to slip and fall in the parking lot of the local supermarket this morning due to ice while I was wearing a dress? And the snow plow dude was just finishing up plowing, thus being treated to a show.

Why did my purse get caught on the door handle while trying to exit a swanky restaurant last week, thus pulling me backwards allowing for a not so graceful exit from said establishment?

Why do I not have heated seats in my car since I live in the Frozen Tundra?

Why did I just receive notice that the suh-weet dress I ordered for New Years Eve online is on back order and scheduled to ship on January 5?

I have no idea...

Holy Cow-It's Almost Christmas

I just looked at the date. I mean really, really looked at the date. People! Christmas is next week! When did that happen? I am all of a sudden having hot -flashy, sweaty non-perimenopausal related anxiety attacks! I am not ready. I thought I was ready. I swear I did. But then Dreamsicle informed us that she KNOWS what Santa is bringing her. Guess what~ the only thing that Santa is bringing her (currently) that she listed is books. Must rush to find puzzles, candy, and a BIG PINK BEAR. In less than a week. Watch out for the crazy woman at the mall this weekend. You have been warned.

A Big Day In A Little Girl's Life

Last Friday Dreamsicle had her first "real" haircut. We started the morning off with a Mommy and Me playdate at the local Gardens. The building was filled with Christmas Trees From Around The World. Each tree decorated with the theme for a different country. As you can see, Dreamsicle started her morning with a picture in the sleigh at the entrance to the building, notice her long, straggly hair? After spending the morning with the other girls I realized we had a hair emergency on our hands and stopped at a children's salon to get her a real big girl hair cut. She was a little shy, but sat there like a trooper. Her bangs are a little short, not the stylist's fault though. Dreamsicle was so caught up with where the stylist was going with those dang scissors near her eyes that she kept looking up to keep a close eye on the sharp pointy things. This caused her eyebrows to be raised during the haircut, thus making the stylist cut them shorter than "just above her brows". After the outing and the haircut we ended our day with a stop at a restaurant for a "treat"! The picture of Dreamsicle with her friends K and M is a picture of three little girls who all came home from China at the same time. K is from Dreamsicle's same orphanage (the little girl in all red)

Dreamsicle

Dreamsicle is slowly beginning to feel better. She doesn't get sick often and has only had the need for an antibiotic one other time in her life. I think this is perhaps why she keeps insisting that she is still sick and needs medicine. All. of. the. time.

She will follow McGyver and I around the house and say in her most pathetic little voice "Mama (or Daddy) Dreamsicle still sick. Need more medicine." Insert 4-5 fake coughs, puppy dog eyes looking up at us and then saying Pweeeeeaaaassseee.

Hmmm, may have to watch this one as she gets older. She is liking her drugs a little too much.

Snow!

Wow! The snow is coming down so hard that we are going to close the office. He! How fun is that? Seriously, this type of snowfall reminds me of when we were kids. It just keeps coming. As much as I question why I live in the Frozen Tundra most of the winter, when the snow is coming down this hard and everything looks so pristine I am actually glad that I live here. It is beyond awesome that I no longer have to worry about driving an hour to and from work in this type of weather.

Dreamsicle has been a very sick little girl these past three days so I am looking forward to having McGyver build us a crackling fire in the fireplace, opening a bottle of wine later this afternoon and just relaxing in the warmth of my home while I drown my daughter in cuddles and snoodles.

I think I feel the need to engage in some serious baking this afternoon. Nothing like filling the house with good smells today too!

The January Project

First I want to give a shout out to my home girl S-I know that you and YW are going through a difficult time right now. I cannot imagine the emotions that you both are dealing with right now. Please know that I am a phone call away (okay a phone call away unless I am driving and my cell phone drops the call like last time we spoke-sorry about that). I have never walked in the shoes you are currently being forced to wear but I can certainly listen. Prayers for you both. Every night.

Speaking of prayers-thanks for your prayers regarding the January Project! I would ask that you continue to keep sending them up on our behalf but it looks like things are back on track. I simply cannot wait to be able to fill you all in.

I just realized that this whole post is all cryptic and vague-sorry about that. The first piece will just stay that way unless you know who my home girl S is, the second one will be revealed in three weeks! Woot!

Reading

One of the things that I love to do is read to Dreamsicle. We have never had the typical read a book at bedtime routine though. We read all of the time except bedtime. Dreamsicle's books started out neatly placed on her bookshelf in her room. During the course of the day the books would seem to migrate on their own out to the living room, thus causing 10 minutes of the "clean up" song each night as we picked the books up and took them back into her room to be placed back on the bookshelf. After a year of doing that (yes, I am a slow learner) I finally decided that since we never read in her room, I needed to change the location of where the books were kept. They are now living in two rubbermaid containers in my living room. When I look at her collection of books, I am pretty proud of the variety that she has accumulated. She is graduating from simple board books to actual paper page books. We talk alot about how we love our books so we must always treat them gently. She gets it-she may throw around a kitty purse or two but never does she mishandle one of her books. It makes me so happy to hear her "read" to me or to her babies, she is doing very well.
Thus the reason for this post (see there really was a reason)-I have most of Dreamsicle's Christmas shopping done-still need to get the stocking stuffers and the Christmas Eve pajama's but other than that she is done. When I looked at the items I purchased for her, I spent just as much money on books for her as I did on toys. I am very pleased with myself over that.
So Christmas morning will be filled with ooh's and aah's as she opens up her laptop and digital camera but the time that I am anticipating the most is when she opens her books. That is the time when my teeny tiny big girl will curl up into my lap, snuggle in close and listen intently as her mama takes her to a land where her imagination will soar as I read to her.

Another Birthday

Today is Chester's 22nd birthday. He is somewhere deep in the sandbox today, I'm hoping that he hears my rendition of happy birthday playing somewhere in his head since I have sung it in my head to him about a million times. I am happy that even though it will be late, he will receive a birthday cake-a little slice of home. I have been staring at a photo of him all day today from when he was a wee lad. His face is covered in chocolate cake, brown eyes shining bright-my wish is that the joy he felt on that birthday oh so long ago is the same joy that he feels in his heart today.

Happy Birthday my sweet boy.

And happy birthday to my angel baby. May your grandpa C and grandma M be holding you close today in Heaven.

-project U*Haul cake was successful-his triple chocolate layer cake arrived in VA two days after his birthday but still in time to be enjoyed-

Random pics

Dreamsicle thinks she needs "glasses" so she borrows McGyver's sunglasses to read, helping fold laundry and trying to get the "money shot" for our Christmas cards

Happy Thanksgiving!

There is much to be thankful for this year in the McGyver home. I survived leaving the "Arrogant's Office" and am busily building a new and exciting company. I am married to a pretty incredible guy. Dreamsicle is flourishing-no longer a baby, well on her way to little girl. X*Boy remains close to home and is the love of Dreamsicle's life. Chester was able to call this morning-allowing us the luxury of speaking to him for the first time since his feet hit the sand. He is busy and safe and that is all that really matters. Pixie and U*Haul have given us a great joy in our grand son Lil Pea. I love my family so much and I am so blessed to have them all healthy and intact.

While speaking to Chester he shared with me that their mail has not caught up with them yet. He will have boxes upon boxes of goodies to open when the mail finally does arrive. The image of the look on his face on that day makes me smile. I know exactly the grin that he will be wearing, the way one eyebrow will lift up and try as he might to not squeal a little, I am sure a little giggle will escape. Let's hope the mail doesn't take to much longer to get there though, other wise the birthday cake I had shipped over to him is probably going to be green instead of chocolate.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone-may you be surrounded by those that you love.

Why Have I Been Awake For The Past Two Hours?

It is now 4:30 am and I have been awake for two hours. I have no idea why. Must have too much stuff going on in my head.

Today is a big day!!

My baby boy turns 21 today. U*Haul was born on Thanksgiving 21 years ago today. This is the first time we will not celebrate that momentous occasion together. I wanted to send him a birthday cake but he swore that he doesn't have an address. Wellll, this mama got a little creative and if all goes well my beautiful brown eyed boy will be receiving a sweet treat today despite him being a nomad with no real address. I decided that if I could get a cake delivered to Chester who is living out of his tank in the middle of the sandbox I could certainly find a way to get one delivered to my son who is simply living in VA.

Why do attorneys have to always be so attorney-ish? It looks like our next big thing which we had lovingly started calling the January project is falling apart because of legal mumbo-jumbo that is simply not acceptable to us. Blech.Please pray hard that we are able to work through all of this.

For the past week Dreamsicle has been waking up at 3:30 and coming up into our room where I promptly get up and take her back down to her own bed, repeat the same thing at 4;30 and again at 5:30. This morning when she appeared at my bedside at 3:30 I kissed her goodnight as I lovingly lay her back down in her bed and she called out to me as I was leaving her room-"mama, your breath stinks-ewww". Nice kid.

She has some new sayings that I think she must have picked up from preschool. Whenever I ask her to do something that she does not want to do she looks me in the eye and says "that is just terrible mama". Or the other one that is bound to become a classic here-"not now mama, I'm working".(Okay, that last one probably didn't come from pre-school)

I Am So Uncool

I thought I would try to "get with the times" and sign up for My*space and Face*book. I hear so many people talk about how they get all into it and catch up with people they haven't seen in forever. It sounds like fun. There is only one problem. I have no idea what I am doing. When that little side bar comes up on my Face*book screen that shows people I *might* be interested in becoming friends with I get all sweaty. What if I ask someone to *be my friend* (gosh does that bring back feelings of uncomfortableness from school) and they decline? What does that say about me? I get a message on my email that alerts me to the fact that someone has written on my "wall" and my head is suddenly filled with Pink Floyd and I get all excited. Wow! Someone is actually communicating with me! Yippee! (Cue Sally Fields-they like me, they really, really like me). Then there is my My*space account where I have 5 friends. 4 of those friends are my family. Hmmm, I happened upon some screen the other day and saw that Chester and U*Haul were actually having a conversation about me from 5 months ago that I had no idea they had-why? because I had no idea that screen was even there! On my own My*space account! And let's not even talk about T*witter. I have no idea what that is but think I should stay far, far away.

I Miss Chester

Dreamsicle and I spent the weekend getting Chester's Christmas boxes put together and ready to ship. Do you have any idea how hard it is to come up with gifts to send to a boy who is living in a tank? He is getting new underwear and socks, a few DVD's, a PSP game, Yahtzee, various balls (football, soccer ball, baseball) and some new books. I purchased four stockings (one for each guy on the tank) and filled them all with little goodies and trinkets as well. I'm not sure how his Tank Commander (TC) is going to feel receiving a stocking since he is Jewish but Chester assured me before he left that they had already discussed it and his TC was cool with it. If anyone reading this blog is Jewish, I would LOVE some ideas on what to send! I also sent a small tree with lights and Dreamsicle and I made salt dough ornaments that we painted and added to the tree this weekend. Chester said they were planning on attaching the tree to one side of the tank and his TC was going to attach a Menorah to the other side, can't wait to see pictures of that!
Getting all of this together made it hit home that my son will celebrate the day of his Saviour's birth half a world away. In a country that doesn't believe. Our boys have chosen career paths that take them far away, put them into dangerous situations and keep them away from those that they love for months at a time all to serve this great Nation. Christmas is going to be rough this year.

Dream-isms

When Lil Pea is crying, Dreamsicle runs to get his "firepass" (pacifier)

When she see a bunny rabbit she will quickly exclaim "Look! a rabbit-bun"

When she is happy she will demand that McGyver and I look at her because she is "shmiling"

She thinks we made up Cwismas (Christmas) just for her. _________(insert her real name here) Cwismas-thank you mama! thank you daddy for ___________(insert her real name here) Cwismas.

Imagine my surprise when she told me yesterday while we were eating dinner-"Mama, Junior in Heaben cuz all dogs go to Heaben."

Just How Big Is 80 Acres?

That is a question I have been pondering since Saturday. I went hunting with McGyver on Saturday. This is the second year that I have joined him in the deer blind. This year he bought me my own gun. Silly, silly man. I practiced shooting it for months before opening day. I got a buck, he didn't. And as I was watching my big burly husband drag the deer out of the woods silently praying that he didn't have a heart attack because man that is alot of work ~ I stepped in deer poop. Yep, a whole 80 acres worth of land and I manage to step in the 6 inch square that contained deer poop. That probably doesn't even suprise you does it?

My eyeballs are all itchy

Why is it that when you cry your eyeballs get itchy? Seriously. I can't do a thing with them.

Yesterday we lost our faithful, pain in the butt, ADD filled 150 pounds of nothing but "I've got to be with my family" at all costs including nudging my big old head into everyone's lap and drinking out of the toilet because I can dog. Junior stopped eating a week ago. We thought he was trying to wait us out since we had just switched dog foods. But by the end of the weekend we knew there was something bigger than an attitude going on with him. McGyver took him into the vet yesterday where they ran tests, tests and more tests. And by the time I got there, he was nearing the end. So my big old clumsy dog passed away with his head in my lap and my tears falling on his face. He had cancer. A big old obstructive tumor. Man I hate that. We spent the evening trying to explain to a 3 year old that Junior wasn't going to be coming back. She is sad, we are sad. And the silence fills each room that he is not in.

The Soft Side

Dreamsicle and I attended a Mommy and Me playgroup on Friday. There were 11 other little girls that are now with their forever families present. 12 girls total. Some older, some younger. Guess whose daughter is the most timid?

As a seasoned mother of three boys, I am used to my children just jumping into new situations and going for it. With Chester and U*Haul, no matter who they were with, or how long they had known the other kids, they would make friends and soon have everyone following their lead. Fear? Ha! They had none.

Not with our girl. She still hangs back, either wanting me to hold her or not venturing too far away. She broke into tears a few times when she dared leave my side only to be ignored by the other little girls that she wanted to play with. I know that some of this is the age. Side by side play is common, little scuffles are to be expected. But my heart broke for her.

When we visited her preschool for their open house, one of the things I noticed was that she was always wanting to be near her teachers and parapro's. Although she could tell me the names of some of the other kids in her class, she was really more into being near the adults. Remember our decision to pull her out of dance/gymnastics? Same thing.

It is times like this when I wonder what she went through the first 11 months of her life. She feels "safe" with adults but not with other children. Did she learn that fighting for what she wanted never gave her the results she needed so it was easier to just back off and wait for the left overs? It frightens me to think of her being so timid as she gets older. Let's face it, girls can be brutal to each other.

I really need a way to help her begin feeling more comfortable with her peers, either that or I am hiring a bodyguard to protect her.

The Crazy Things In Life

So, it has been a long time since I have posted anything about my day to day bumblings but here goes.

I had a meeting with a potential client. Nice Dress? Check. Shaved Legs? Check. Nice high heel shoes? Check-oops wait a minute-high heel shoe would be more accurate. Snapped one of my stilletos before I made it to the clients office (actually while I was driving, I know, I know, don't ask). Emergency pitstop at a shoe store in strange city? Check.

While visiting the ladies room in our new office building, listened to the person in the next stall carry on an entire conversation while "doing her business". I could tell by the words she was using she was actually speaking to one of her clients. I almost felt guilty flushing.

Before visiting with another potential client I thought it would be smart to order a wrapped style sandwich. Thinking it would be safe because it just had veggies on it, still thought that right up to the point where I took a bite and half of the wrap fell onto my shirt. My beautiful turquoise blue shirt, have you guessed what was in there yet? Dijon mustard. How did I miss that bit of information when looking on the menu?

Random Pics

Chester's pre-birthday celebration when he was home on leave. Yep, those really are Pow*er Rang*ers on that cake.

What? You don't drink your Bloody Mary's with a fish? This was the first drink after my first 5K, at that moment, I would have drank the Bloody Mary OUT of the fish to help ease the throbbing in my legs.

Dreamsicle's first day of school

What's New?

Happy Veterans Day! This is one of those days that gets me all teary eyed. My father, my father in law, my husband and now my children all having served or are currently serving makes this a special day in the McGyver house. Please keep my military men in your prayers. Both are going through rough patches right now so I would certainly appreciate you all lifting them up.

In other McGyver family news:

The office is coming along. I am bidding for business every week so that is a good sign.
Dreamsicle loves to come into the "oppice" and work.

We had her preschool open house last night. It was fun to meet the other parents and see her interact with her teachers. My girl lurvs her teachers. We all had to meet in the gym at a specified time to do a rousing rendition of the "hokey pokey" which I have not done since I was a little girl on roller skates back in the day. Dreamsicle thought it was hilarious to see her mama "shake it all about". We are really trying to work with her and the pronounciation of words. Milk is still "Nilk". Love is still "wuv". Cereal is still "c-we-all" you get the picture. Although a part of me will miss her little sayings, she is a "beeg gool now" (big girl now) and we really need to help her along.

The big thing that cannot be talked about yet is coming along but would like to ask that you continue to cover us in prayer.

I Voted!

Did you?

I got to our local polling place and the parking lot was jammed. At 6:50 am this morning. Lots of people, everyone was in good spirits and the lines moved quickly. It's funny when you live in a small town and there is only one place to vote. You see people that you rarely see, strike up conversations that you normally wouldn't have. That is the part of small town life that I love. The ability to keep it real even on a day filled with emotions such as today. We all found it amusing that Star*bucks and Kri*spy Creme are giving away free goodies for anyone that voted. I commend them for that, too bad we would have to drive an hour to enjoy their goodies. (One of the drawbacks of living in a small town)

In other news...

I have BIG news that I can't spill the beans on yet but wanted to mention it here just so that you could all cover us in prayer. The Lord knows what we're up to, I'd appreciate you all throwing our names up to Him if you are so inclined.

**No, we are not adopting again. Even though I would again in a minute, I don't think Mr McGyver's heart is being moved in that direction**

Fun Halloween Pics and Pic of the Fam Along With The Biggest Balloon Bouquet I Have Ever Seen!

From Left Back-U*Haul, X*Boy, Chester

From Left Front-Pixie, Dreamsicle, Mr & Mrs McGyver and Siren

Things I Love

Wow, I am back to being a blogging machine!

As I am sitting at my desk with the sun shining in on me, I thought it would be a great time to list the things that are making me happy.

1. The sun shining so brightly, especially since today is Halloween.

2. The look of our new office. We really have created a warm, inviting space for people to work in. No sterile grey or white can be found in our little office environment!

3. The positive attitude that permeats this office right now. I LOVE THAT!

4. My Lil Pea.

5. Having U*Haul home and being able to love on him.

6. Dreamsicle. Even on her most stubborn 3 year old day can still make me smile.

7. Mr. McGyver. For all of the reasons listed in my Happy Anniversary Post

8. My extended family. Really. I am so blessed to have an extended family that truly cares about what is happening with me and my fam.

9. Mr. McCrabby whom I love dearly (my father in law). You don't get more salt of the earth than him and we have such a strong connection to each other without actually gushing words of love to each other. We both just know.

10. That the election ads will soon be over. Yeah!

Happy Thanksgiving!

What? It's not Thanksgiving at your house? Well it is at ours! U*Haul leaves to go back to being a bubble head on Saturday so we are celebrating Thanksgiving and his birthday today. I was baking like a mad woman last night to make sure that I had made everything that he had requested for today's dinner. U*Haul and Pixie will be experiencing their first attempt at the Turkey since I am working today. I thought it might be easier for Pixie to make her first bird while she is still here and I can help her if she needs it. And hello-did you read that I am working??? I can't believe how good it feels to be working again. In a real live office, with real live staff and real live clients. Happy, Happy, Happy! about working!

Lil Pea is keeping his mama and daddy busy. I cannot believe that we have been blessed so much. It is such an honor to watch that little family interact. That baby is definately going to be well loved. As hard as it is going to be to let him go when Pixie and Lil Pea are finally able to join U*Haul, I can rest well in the assurance that they will care for their babe with all that they have in them.

Dreamsicle is thriving preschool. I picked her up on Monday and her teacher came out to share something with me. She was going to read Hump*ty Dump*ty to Dreamsicle and then Dreamsicle told her she wanted to read to the teacher. The following is Dreamsicle's version of Hump*ty Dump*ty...

Humpy Dumpy Sat On Wall
Humpy Dumpy Fall
Humpy Dumpy Cwy (cry)
Humpy Dumpy's mama hug him

That's my girl.
She is going to be a pirate for Halloween. She is practicing her ARRGGH and Ahoy Mates to make sure she has the proper tone and gives the scary one eye look. If I could ever figure out how to U*Tube I would so be posting that here.

Still have not heard from Chester. My heart hurts. Must send another care package. If I can't hear his voice at least he will know we are thinking about him, and trying to fatten him up since it seems as if all I send is chocolate lately!

X*Boy and Mr McGyver are doing well so that about rounds out the family update.

My Never Ending Love

Happy Anniversary Mr McGyver!

It hardly seems possible that we have been joined in matrimony for 24 years. Where did all of that time go? You certainly have held up well-thanks for that!

Speaking of thanks, allow me to list the things I am thankful for about you...

I am thankful that the public school system of which we both attended had the foresight to place us in the same classroom in kindergarten, thus allowing for our statement of "we've known each other our whole lives" to be very true.

I am thankful that you pursued me through out high school even when I was being a twit and trying to set you up with all of my friends.

I am thankful that for as long as I have known you, you have always had a listening ear, a tender heart and big love for lil' old me.

I am thankful that you allow me to chase my dreams and sometimes make those dreams yours too.

I am thankful that when you wrap your huge arms around me I have no fear. Nothing can hurt me when my man is protecting me.

I am thankful that we made 4 beautiful babies together-three of which have turned out to be remarkable young men and that we added a 5th beautiful baby to our family who is going to be just as remarkable.

I am thankful that Dreamsicle has such a loving and fun father to look up to. When I see the way she looks at you with such love and trust it brings me to tears.

I am thankful for the very essence of who you are, my partner, my lover, my best friend.

The *Heart* Of War~Tales From The Mom Side

The first time Chester was deployed, I knew in my very soul that he would be safe. Although I worried, it wasn't gut wrenching-just normal Mom worry that must flow through every military mom's veins.

This time is different. Things that Chester couldn't (or wouldn't) say about this deployment put my Mom-dar on high alert. It is already different. I can feel it. Chester had told us that we would not hear from him as much as we did last time and I am steeling myself up to keep repeating the military family mantra*stop worrying, no news means good news*. It is hard. So. Very. Hard.

His unit has a completely different dynamic to it this time. I think the people that we met when we saw him off seemed to mesh well together but they are definately alot more "moto" than last time. I haven't finished processing what that could mean yet.

I always get teary when I hear the National Anthem or hear a group of people reciting the Pledge of Allegiance. I always have. But having children in the military really brings the fact that our freedom comes with a price that much closer. I am filled with pride over the choice two of our sons have made to serve our Country but become outraged when I listen to the news.

The last thing I heard before heading off to work this morning was that there is a proposed budget cut of 25% for military spending. Are you kidding me? Do my children not deserve the very best in equipment, intelligence and support that We The People can provide? Are their lives worth anything less than that? Yep, the Mama Bear in me is coming out, don't mess with our military.

I hope those that have the ability to stop that cut remember that inside every Soldier, Sailor, Airman and Marine lies the heart of someone's son or daughter. The heart and soul of this country. The beating hearts and souls of this family.

Pictures of the Lil Pea

22 Hours Of Hard Labor

No, I wasn't forced to join a chain gang over the weekend, thus being sentenced to 22 hours of hard labor.

That is the amount of time it took for my new grandson to make his entrance into this world! He is amazingly beautiful-lots of dark hair, a button nose and looooong feet just like his daddy. He has a cleft chin just like his Grandpa C did and both U*Haul and Pixie are over the moon.

For family that care about this kind of stuff...he ended up being delivered by C section, he weighed in at 7lbs 10 oz and is 20 inches long. He does look like he could be part of the old cast of the Saturday Night Live show what with his conehead and all but our hearts have forever been stolen by this tiny little peanut.

I am off to the hospital now to hold my newest love and to breathe in all that is good and right with the world that comes with a new birth.

Second Verse Same As The First

We just returned home from seeing Chester off for round number 2 of playing in the sandbox. We received a call that he had arrived at his original destination safely and that he would call when he reached his final destination.

The second time of sending him off to war wasn't any easier. I am not sure why I thought it would be. In my mind I thought I was prepared. As we sat in our car on base, watching him go through the predeployment ritual, much the same as the first time I kept telling myself that my heart was ready. Then the busses pulled in. I kissed and hugged my son one final time, whispering secret words into his precious ear and watched the man who was once my boy stand tall and proud as he stepped onto that bus. Looking back once he waved. Then he was gone.

This mothers heart hurts just as much now as it did the first round. This deployment is familiar but so different. This time he misses Thanksgiving, his birthday, Christmas-every holiday that you can think of will be spent inside the metal confines of his tank.

So the wait begins. The purchasing of the never ending need for new socks and undies does to. As we wait, we pray. Please God, keep our troops safe.

When The Lights Go Out, It Sure Gets Dark

It is cold and rainy here in the Mitten State and lots of things are on my mind. Good things, not so good things, confusing things. Things. Things. Things!

First, the good things:
Good Thing #1- We have signed client #2! We are putting the finishing touches on our real live honest to goodness office that is not in my home! I feel anxious, happy and excited all at the same time about this new venture.

Good Thing #2-Our retirement fund is still doing okay.

Good Thing #3-All of my children were able to spend 48 hours together recently. Lots of pictures were taken, some will make it onto this blog at some point in time.

Not So Good Thing #1-We are all sick, sick sick here.

Not So Good Thing #2-Chester called with his deployment date. Which happens to land very close to the scheduled induction of Pixie. I very well may miss my very first grandbaby's entrance into this world.

Confusing Thing #1-Although we are bursting with anticipation about our new business, there are many people who are silently (some not so silently) hoping that we fail. I don't understand that. What kind of a mindset do you have to have to not want to cheer people on? To not want to see someone succeed? Or to be so consumed by what we are doing that it takes over your life. That is some sick, scary stuff I tell you. There have been times in my life when I may not have cared for someone but I was always willing to give them credit for chasing a dream and often times proud when they made their dreams come true. Why can't everyone just want the best for everyone else?

Confusing Thing #2-How can you think you have friendships with people for 10+ years only to find out that those friendships weren't real? I'm still trying to figure out how you can attend (or be in) weddings, be in attendance for funerals, births of babes and such and not hear one word from people that you shared so much with.

Confusing Thing #3-This election. I'm not going to post a political rant here (although I could) but I certainly don't understand why questions are not being raised.

And finally, if you haven't read this blog, go do it. http://blog.cjanerun.com

Read what this family is going through with their sister and brother in law and how the rest of the family is stepping up.

It will certainly put things in perspective.

Family Life

Pictures of Dreamsicle at the zoo, the Children's Museum and the best one of all...Don't you wish you could have this much fun? It started raining unexpectedly one day while Dreamsicle was playing in her sandbox. She had such a blast splashing through the puddles on the way into the house that I had to snap a photo when she finally decided it was time to come in and get dry. And yes, that really is a 40 pound bag of dog food. Rottweilers. eat. alot.

In other news: U*Haul is graduating at the top of his class. This mama could not be prouder. He is coming home this Friday and I'm not sure Pixie is going to sleep a wink until then she is so excited to see him.

Then next Friday Chester and his new friend whom I will refer to as "Siren" are coming in from Cali for his predeployment leave. I am so dang proud of him as well. He was just promoted so both of my military men are doing well.

X*Boy is still loving life working for us.

Now on to a PSA***I have a sitemeter turned on here so those of you that are now following my blog from The Arrogants Office need to know that I can tell who you are*** And may I just remind you that reading blogs on company time is a serious offense. I should know, I wrote that policy. :) Please run along, you will not get any dirt on any one from this here family friendly blog.

Now We Are Cooking With Gas!

We signed our first account last Friday-bring on the resumes!